Lone Star Longing (Hearts of Broken Wheel, #1) Read online

  “Where do you want to go?”

  “I don't know Something that’s the farthest from being a diner as you can imagine.”

  “I think I know the place.”

  He didn't have to drive very far, since the shopping center was filled with restaurants as well as stores. In fact, she thought they could probably take care of her maternity clothes requirements without leaving the parking lot.

  “Oh, a steakhouse?” she asked when he parked in front of the building with white-washed brick and a giant logo painted on the side.

  “It’s good, I promise, and if you don't really like steak, they have other options. Plus they have lunch specials.”

  Her mouth started watering just smelling the food when she slid out of the truck.

  “Before we even go in there, I’m letting you know I’m buying,” she said. She would rather have this argument out here with customers streaming in and out, than in there in front of the waitress. “I was planning to take Poppy, so since you drove, I’ll treat you.”

  “You don't have to do that. I volunteered.”

  “You did, but I would like to do this, so please let me.”

  She expected more of an argument, to be honest, but he finally nodded, then stepped ahead to hold the door for her.

  The inside of the restaurant was cool, with murals on the wall and street signs from around the city. The place was busy, but they’d missed most of the lunch crowd, so the hostess led them to a table right away, and handed them heavy menus with pages of options. Lacey hadn’t even let herself think about being hungry until this minute, and now she wanted everything on the menu. She perused the lunch specials, sipping gratefully from the glass of ice water.

  “What do you get here?” she asked Beck.

  “I like the prime rib.”

  “I don't think I’ve ever had prime rib in my life.”

  “First time for everything.”

  When was she going to have another chance? She closed her menu. “I’ll do that.”

  “So did everything go okay with the doctor?” he asked once the waitress had moved away to place their order with the kitchen.

  “Oh, yes. I liked her a lot. And she did the sonogram. You want to see the picture?” She reached into her purse before he could answer.

  “Sure.”

  She leaned over the table, holding the picture in her hands. “Here’s how she explained it to me. He’s laying this way.” She pointed.

  “He?”

  Lacey shrugged. “Assumption. Way too soon to tell, which I knew anyway. So he is laying this way, and this is his spine, or what will be his spine. His head is this way and his butt is this way.”

  “He looks just like you,” Beck said solemnly, and Lacey laughed, then sat back and tucked the picture away.

  “He’s due on Halloween.”

  “Aw, poor kid.”

  “Or lucky kid, depending on your point of view. I’ve always loved Halloween, myself. When I was a kid and we were stationed in North Carolina, we lived on the best street for trick or treating. Mom made us costumes, you know, there were four of us, and oh my gosh, we couldn't wait to get out to the street and run door to door. We’d come home with bags of candy so full, we could barely lift them. And Mom would almost always let us skip school the next day.”

  “Sounds like a great memory. We didn't celebrate Halloween.”

  “No? Because you lived so far out, or...?” She knew some religions didn't celebrate the holiday.

  “That was a big part of it. I mean, neither of my parents wanted to drive us into town to trick or treat, so my mom kind of frowned on it, being the devil’s birthday, all that.”

  “So you don't like Halloween?”

  “I like it fine, now, but it wasn't a big deal for us growing up. Yours sounds like the kids in the movies, you know, the ones who are always blissfully trick or treating while Michael murders everyone in the houses.”

  She laughed again. “Do you like scary movies?”

  “Oh, yeah. Now that, we spent a lot of time watching growing up. Chucky, Michael, Freddy.”

  “I like the haunted house ones. I could not live out there in the middle of nowhere and watch them, though.”

  “That makes them even better,” he said with a grin, tossing back a swallow of ice water.

  They talked about their favorite scary movies until the salads came, something she never thought they would discuss. In fact, she hadn’t thought they would have anything in common to discuss, and yet one subject tumbled into another, until she looked around and saw the restaurant was almost empty, the waitress’s shift about to change.

  She pulled herself together and motioned for the bill so the waitress could get her tip before she clocked out.

  “You ready to go, then?” he asked, tossing his cloth napkin on the empty plate.

  “I’d better...run to the restroom after all that water. Don't leave me,” she said, sliding out of the booth.

  “Not a chance.” And this grin was something different.

  She wouldn't let herself think about it when she hurried to the other room.

  SHE DIDN'T WANT HIM to go into the shops with her, said she’d just be a minute, and that she was worried about the supplies in the car getting stolen, so he sat in his truck listening to the radio and blasting the AC, scrolling through his phone.

  And yeah, he looked up Riley on Google to see his standings. He was doing well, but not as well as he would have been doing if Beck was still on his team.

  Yes, that was arrogant, but true.

  So he wouldn't dwell on it, he flipped over to another social media site to distract himself.

  But nothing held his attention. His thoughts kept drifting back to the conversation at lunch.

  Lacey’s strength had drawn him, and of course the connection they had because of the bus accident. But he’d watched her just light up talking about, of all things, Halloween and scary movies. She was funny and animated and he really liked her a lot.

  And she was pregnant with another man’s child. No matter how much courage he had, he hadn’t worked up enough to ask what she was going to do about that, if she was going to keep him in her life, get married.

  Those were important things to find out before he started letting his mind go down that road.

  Damn, he should be in the store with her. Someone should be with her. He didn't want her to think she was inconveniencing him. She wasn’t. He wanted to be here.

  But before he could make the decision to go inside, she was at the truck, holding a couple of bag, waving at him to unlock the door.

  “That doesn't look like very much,” he said when she leaned the seat forward to toss her bags in the back seat.

  “Oh, I got some versatile stuff, stuff that will grow with me, until I get really big, but I didn't want to get too much, you know, and it doesn’t matter all that much since I’ll be coming to town once a month for appointments.”

  “Until Austin comes back.”

  “No offense, but I do not want Austin in my personal business, if you know what I mean. I mean, I know him too well, and I don't want him to know me more than I know him.”

  “It’s a long drive once a month.”

  “I know. But I really like this doctor.”

  “She probably won’t deliver the baby, though, will she? I mean, you go into labor, you’re not going to make this drive.”

  “That’s probably true, unless we can schedule it.”

  “What do you mean, schedule it?” He pulled to the exit, then into traffic.

  “She can induce labor, if she thinks the baby is getting too big. Or a c-section.”

  He glanced over in surprise. “You don't want a c-section, do you?”

  “No, not if I can help it, but it’s an option I have to think about. And I have to think about childbirth classes. There aren’t any in Broken Wheel, but I’ll have to look to see if any are offered in Kimmel. Otherwise, I don't know what. Maybe I can do it online.”

/>   He laughed, but realized she was serious.

  “You know, Skype or something. So I’ll be participating, but not have to drive.”

  “Ain’t technology grand.”

  “Well, we’ll see if it’s even an option.” She rubbed her hand on her forehead. “I didn't think it would be so hard to be so far away. Maybe I need to think about moving.”

  He heard the surprise at her own conclusion in her voice, the sorrow.

  “Weird. I never think I love Broken Wheel until I think about leaving it. But when I go see my mom, or my sister, or go to San Angelo, I can’t wait to get back. And then I think about its limitations...I don't know. I guess I have some time to look into it.”

  Not much, if the baby was going to be born in October, but he didn't say so.

  Chapter Ten

  LACEY DRUMMED HER FINGERS on the desk as she waited for the Skype to connect. She framed the sonogram picture in her fingers, shifted it, then glanced back at the computer screen just as Jesse’s image flickered on. He leaned close, his brow creased. The line of his body was impatient, half turned away from her, like he was ready to bolt mid-call. Or find an excuse to end it.

  “Hey. Lacey. What’s going on?”

  “I, ah, I had my first doctor’s appointment.”

  “Doctor’s appointment?”

  “With the obstetrician? I thought you might want to see the sonogram picture?” She hated that everything was coming out as a question. But had he forgotten? How had he forgotten? That might explain why he hadn’t contacted her. She didn't know what his mission was. He might have been busy. At least that was what she’d been telling herself, day after day, when she didn't hear. That he was on an important mission.

  “Yeah, I know. So, boy or girl?”

  “Oh, it’s too early to tell. I just—they told me the due date. The baby is due on Halloween. Do you think—do you think you might be home then? For his birth?

  “It’s a boy?”

  Maybe it was the connection. “No. Too soon to tell. But he’ll be born the end of October, the beginning of November.”

  “Ah. I see.”

  “Can you—will you be home by then? Can you ask to come home?” She didn't know if the Air Force had paternity leave, or if they’d offer it to a single soldier.

  “I can see what I can do. I do have leave next month. I’ll be home for a week.”

  The emotion that ran through her was indescribable—joy and dread all braided together. Maybe, if he was home, without distractions, they could work out whatever this was.

  “Oh, yes. Oh, I can’t wait. Look, look, can you see this?” She fumbled the picture and held it to the camera, then craned her head to look so she could show him. “This is his spine, and his head is here. And this is his little butt.”

  “I can’t see anything. Looks like a bunch of squiggly lines.”

  “Well, it’s only June, he’s only the size of an apple. But this is the first picture of your baby.”

  “Are they going to do a sonogram every time?”

  “I don't know. Maybe.”

  “Well, call me back when you have one of those that I can actually see.”

  “If you let me know when you’re going to be here, maybe you can go to the doctor with me.”

  “I won’t have time for that.”

  Okay, she was starting to get pissed. “Why can’t you be happy? Or a little bit excited?”

  “You don't know what my life is like over here. I’m going to need a lot of down time. Time with my guys.”

  “Don't you have enough time with your guys?”

  He scowled at the screen. “Are you turning into that woman? Now that you’re pregnant, you’re just going to nag me?”

  Taken aback, she squared her shoulders. Was she? “No. That is absolutely not what I’m going to be.”

  “Good.”

  “I just want you to want to spend time with me and your baby when you’re here.”

  “My baby. It’s not even alive yet.”

  She drew in a breath between her teeth. “It is. I heard its heartbeat.”

  “You know what I mean. It’s not even outside your body. How can I spent time with it?”

  “You know what I mean. I’m asking you to spend time with me and think about what our future is going to be like with this baby.” She didn't want to ask him more than that. She didn't want to push him into proposing, because honestly? She didn't know what her answer would be.

  “We’ll, ah, talk about it when the time gets closer. All right? I need to go, but I’ll talk to you soon.”

  He disconnected the call without a word of affection.

  Well. Why was she putting up with this? She could do this on her own. She needed to make sure, though. She needed to see him in person.

  But since she was biting the bullet here, she figured it was time to tell her mother.

  Lacey looked at her phone for a long time before she got up the nerve to dial. This wasn't the sort of news one delivered over text message. She was going to have to call her mother and tell her she was pregnant. She couldn't imagine what her mother’s reaction would be.

  She couldn't remember the last time she’d heard her mother’s voice, to be honest. The two of them texted at least once a week, but rarely spoke.

  Why oh why couldn't she text this news? Her mom would know something was up as soon as she saw the number on her screen. But Lacey couldn't tell her sister until she told her mother, so she needed to call.

  “Lacey? What happened? Is it your dad?”

  The question surprised Lacey. Did her mom still have feelings about her dad? Of course, she probably would. They had four children together.

  “No, Mom, Dad’s fine. It’s, well, I have some news.”

  “Are you getting married? To Jesse? How long have you been dating? It’s about time. I’ve been waiting for this forever. I already have my dress.”

  Why did her mother insert her own ideas? Why didn't she just listen? Or was that the problem all along? “Mom, no. I’m not getting married. Not to Jesse. Not...no. I have different news. I’m going to have a baby.”

  A beat of silence. A beat that stretched. And stretched.

  “But you’re not getting married?”

  “No, not at this point.” She took a deep breath and moved forward. “It’s due in October. On Halloween. I’ve only had a little morning sickness, but everything is better now.”

  “And your dad? What did he say?”

  “He’s happy. We’re going to stay here until we can figure out what we’re doing next, but Dad said he’ll help watch the baby while I work.”

  “So what happened with you and Jesse?”

  “Well, nothing, yet, but I’m waiting until he comes home and we’ll talk about it then. I guess it’s hard for him to focus on it while he’s overseas.”

  “I can see that, but what did he say when you told him?”

  “He asked what my mother thought about becoming a grandmother again.”

  Another beat of silence. “He did not.”

  “No, he didn’t. Mom. I’m going to have my first baby. You’re more interested in Jesse and Dad’s reactions?”

  “Well, this is a big deal, honey. I don't want you going through this on your own.”

  “I’m not.”

  “It isn’t easy, you know, having a baby, even when you have someone by your side. Have you really thought this all the way through? Do you want to have this baby?”

  Leave it to her mom to go that route. “Yes, I want this baby. Yes, I want to have this baby. That’s not even a question.”

  “Because if it is...”

  “It’s not, Mom. No matter what Jesse wants, this baby is mine.” Tears burned the back of her throat. How could her mother even think she would want to get rid of this baby? She wasn't afraid of how hard it would be, she wasn't afraid of the sacrifices she’d have to make. This child would never ever doubt that his mother loved him. Never ever.

  “I guess I’ll s
tart getting excited, then,” her mother said with an oddly bright tone.

  Don’t force yourself, Lacey thought to herself before she disconnected the call.

  BECK WASN'T WORKING as urgently to get his mother’s house finished. He didn't have any place to be, and was no hurry trying to figure it out. He kind of liked the routine he was in, working at his mom’s place during the day, heading into town to shoot the shit with the old guys at the hardware store, on Sundays hanging out at The Wheel House playing washers and watching Lacey move.

  Her belly was growing, and she was at once so easy about it and cautious. He loved watching how aware she was of her baby, but at the same time moving with this incredible grace.

  “What the hell, man?” Con nudged his shoulder, hard, when he came to sit next to him on the bench of the picnic table in the yard of The Wheel House.

  “What?” Beck enjoyed the camaraderie of his old high school classmates, even if he’d never been as close to them as they currently were to each other. They’d accepted him with no question.

  Until now.

  “What do you mean?”

  “She’s got a guy. In the service.”

  “Yeah, I know. He’s not great to her. I mean, she hasn’t talked to him since the sonogram.” He hoped Con didn't ask how he knew.

  “So, what? You’re going to step in? Be a hero? Take care of another man’s kid? What are you going to do for a living here in town?”

  “Whoa, whoa, slow down. I don't know what you’re talking about. It’s not anything like that.”

  “Only it is. I see the way you look at her. I see how you always sit next to her. And if it was just her, I’d be cool. But she needs someone who’s going to stand up. This guy she’s with, he’s not standing, but she’s still with him. She deserves better.”

  “She does,” Beck agreed.

  “But that’s not you. You’re going to get tired of this place, of your mom, like you did before, and you’re going to take off, and you’re not going to be any better than this loser she’s with now.”

  Beck wanted to call bullshit. He really did. But too many of Con’s words rang true. Too many. What would he do if he stayed in Broken Wheel? And would Lacey want to come with him if he left? Was he really going to drag a woman and child all around the country?